You've carried me in your arms.
You've protected me from harm.
The journey has been long.
Not much further shall it prolong.
I'm in the home stretch.
I'm close to finishing this race.
I've been through the darkness.
Overcame the obstacles I had to face.
You heard me when my voice felt unheard.
You listened to me rejoice and complain, ever single word.
I feel a sense of closure.
I've been trying to keep my composure.
Praise be to you my Lord!
I'll dance in the joy of hope.
Bring on the thunderstorm.
I want to see what else I can cope.
Life has its up and downs.
It gives you smiles and frowns.
I know you will always be near.
In Jesus, who
A haunted chanting seeps through my mind's wall,
sings tales of the rotten Crimson Marquis.
I scream:
“Your world is killing me –
your words are filling me!”
My mind is torn apart with this last call.
I am churned by visions of blazing clefts,
of hollow words, deceit and dreadful dreams,
of demonic herds and torrential streams;
yet the voice mocks the bit of me that's left.
It consumes my thoughts, seeking for freedom.
“They get their way, I fade away –
Oh God, my mind, it fades to grey!”
And finally, they have killed my reason.
Dreaded by their blasphemous contagion
I say: “We are many,
i.
because who are you to tell me how to feel
pain
what it is to feel
absolutely nothing?
who the fuck are you to stay by my side
all night
crying
asking god for forgiveness
asking him to show himself and quit being such a fucking coward?
who were you to ever lay a hand on me?
ii.
because you never stayed up like you said you did
not until 6 am
not tearing your own heart out
for me.
you lied about beauty
and how much you admired the way i carried it.
you know what?
it was all bullshit
and you were only angry because i knew the truth.
iii.
because i was never what you wanted -
what we
wanted.
i was never what you dreamed of and you
you were
I am distracted
Shattered into pieces
In denial
With no words left in my head
So dark inside
Craving for anything
To feel
So alone with my demons
They are all over me
They are all behind me
It's the only thing I'd ever see
They are all against me
I'm dead inside
Without a voice that guards me
Through the torment
Nothing is real anymore
And I beg them for sympathy
Ask to leave me here
Forever
Living in denial or never living at all
The breaking of night and the start of tomorrow,
These are the things being consumed so completely,
That in the wake of a heart,
Of gold,
And oceans drained a drop each time,
Will flicker again
And wait to keep.
The seed of all bestowed on us
A world we should hold dear
To find the strength to live as one
In love, rejecting fear
Each one of us a guardian
For future generations
To tend the land and balance seek
Transcending creed and nation
When we look back in history
Most ancient times unfold
Birth right, divisions, separation
A family split, grown cold
Now as the planet ails to us
Will we lack eyes to see?
Or ears to hear our lack of soul?
And lose our will to be?
I sent a call up to the sky
'I've learned division bleeds us dry
Our only hope's to reconcile
Have I toiled errant path this while?'
The next morn as I traveled forth
White dove towa
They tell me I’m silver tongued
All the right words tripping over my lips
(All the right things I do with your tip)
I know how to beg, I know how to please
(I know what to do when I’m down on my knees)
And
They tell me I’m servile
That I know how to behave
(Slut, whore, bitch, slave)
I know they’re right, I know it’s true
(I never need prodding to do what I do)
And
I tell them nothing
For it leads to disgrace
(Not only that, I know my place)
Any question I ask, leads to disaster
(What’s that you say? Right away, Master)